Death Note pick up lines
by XxDarkWxX
Summary: The various pick up lines of the Death Note verse. This is what happens when you give 13 yr old girls a computer.
1. Chapter 1

1. Light: hi my name is doug... spelled backwords thats god with a little bit of 'u' wrapped up in it!

2. Light: wanna make like egg and get laid?*

3. Misa: Baby im no fred flinstone but i can make ur bed rock!

4. Light: What time is it? Misa:10:30 Light:"10:30? So today is January 10,1999, at 10:30 PM, thanks I just wanted to be able to remember the exact moment that I met you."*

5. Light: Baby, if you were words on a page, you'd be what they call fine print

6. Misa: Don't walk into that building - the sprinklers might go off!

7. Light: Excuse me, I'd like to have kids someday, and I wanted to know how your parents created such a beautiful creature.

8. Misa: Got me? I'll do your body good.*

9. Misa: Didn't anyone tell you that you wanted to sleep with me? I thought you knew...*

10. Light: Have you ever kissed a rabbit between the ears? (Pulls his pockets inside out...) Would you like to?*

11. Light: Hey babe, wanna get LUCKY!*

12. Misa: Hi, I'm a tawdry slut looking for a good time.

13. Misa: I love you. I want to marry you. Now fuck my brains out.*

14. Light:I think we have to make love on the front lawn like crazed weasels NOW!

15. Light:My name's Light. That's so you know what to scream.

16. Light: Take off that dress and fuck my brains out, you cave newt.*

17. Light: What do you say we go back to my room and do some math: Add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply.*

18. Light: First, I'd like to kiss you passionately on the lips, then, I'll move up to your belly button.

19. Light: So do you fuck, suck and take it up the ass or am I wasting my time on a Jesus freak?

20. Misa: Excuse me. My friend over there is a little embarrassed. She'd like your phone number. She wants to know where she can get a hold of me in the morning.*

21. Light: (Use index finger to call her over then says) I made you come with one finger, imagine what I could do with my whole hand.*

22. Light: I'm Irish. Do you have any Irish in you? Would you like some?*

23. Misa: "So, did you here the one about the guy and the girl who had the most sexual relationship?" Light:"No." "Well then, let's go to my place and I'll tell you all about it."

24. Light: Um...I need a little help with my Calculus, can you integrate my natural log? Misa:?

25. Light: If you had some nuts on the wall, couldn't they be called walnuts? (Yes). If you had some nuts on your chest, could they be called chestnuts? (Yes) If you had some nuts on your chin, could they be chinnuts? (Yes.) Hell no, you'd have a dick in your mouth.*

26. Light:You know how some men buy really expensive cars to make up for certain, well, shortages? Well, I don't even own a car.

27. Light: How do you like your eggs in the morning? Fertilized?

28. Light: Are you a virgin? (No.) Prove it!*

29. Light: Do you live on a chicken farm? (No.) You sure know how to raise cocks

30. Misa: Pick a number between 1 and 10. You lose. Take off your clothes.*

31. Misa: I don't know what you think of me, but I hope it's X-rated.

32. Misa: I'm easy, but it looks like you are hard.*

33. Misa: I wanna take out your golf clubs and score a HOLE in 1.

34. Light: Hi. I'm horny.*

35. Light: You look like my type: Nice hair, beautiful eyes, amazing body, but there is still just one problem: your clothing. (What's wrong with my clothing?) They're still on.*

36. Light: My cat has lovely fur. Can I see yours?*

37. Misa: You know how I am with dicks? I suck at it.

38. Light: You're on my list of things to do tonight.*

39. Light: "I have this magic watch that can actually talk to me. Seriously, it's saying something right now." Put ear to watch. "It says that you're not wearing any underwear, is that true?." [No.] "Oh..." Tap watch a few times. "That's the problem... my watch is an hour fast!"*

40. Light: I'm gonna have sex tonight! I'm gonna have sex tonight! (With whom?) Depends: What are you doing tonight at around 1?*

Brandihyuuga-i know iknow...not enough misa ones but hey! i tried! i think this one went a little more vivid then the last chapter..


	2. LightxMisa

brandihyuuga123-second chapter up!!!!

Chapter 2--- Light to misa and vise versa!

1. Light: hi my name is doug.... spelled backwords thats god with a little bit of 'u' wrapped up in it!

2. Light: wanna make like egg and get laid?*

3. Misa: Baby im no fred flinstone but i can make ur bed rock!

4. Light: What time is it? Misa:10:30 Light:"10:30? So today is January 10,1999, at 10:30 PM, thanks I just wanted to be able to remember the exact moment that I met you."*

5. Light: Baby, if you were words on a page, you'd be what they call fine print

6. Misa: Don't walk into that building -- the sprinklers might go off!

7. Light: Excuse me, I'd like to have kids someday, and I wanted to know how your parents created such a beautiful creature.

8. Misa: Got me? I'll do your body good.*

9. Misa: Didn't anyone tell you that you wanted to sleep with me?!?! I thought you knew.....*

10. Light: Have you ever kissed a rabbit between the ears? (Pulls his pockets inside out....) Would you like to?*

11. Light: Hey babe, wanna get LUCKY!?*

12. Misa: Hi, I'm a tawdry slut looking for a good time.

13. Misa: I love you. I want to marry you. Now fuck my brains out.*

14. Light:I think we have to make love on the front lawn like crazed weasels NOW!

15. Light:My name's Light. That's so you know what to scream.

16. Light: Take off that dress and fuck my brains out, you cave newt.*

17. Light: What do you say we go back to my room and do some math: Add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply.*

18. Light: First, I'd like to kiss you passionately on the lips, then, I'll move up to your belly button.

19. Light: So do you fuck, suck and take it up the ass or am I wasting my time on a Jesus freak?

20. Misa: Excuse me. My friend over there is a little embarrassed. She'd like your phone number. She wants to know where she can get a hold of me in the morning.*

21. Light: (Use index finger to call her over then says) I made you come with one finger, imagine what I could do with my whole hand.*

22. Light: I'm Irish. Do you have any Irish in you? Would you like some?*

23. Misa: "So, did you here the one about the guy and the girl who had the most sexual relationship?" Light:"No." "Well then, let's go to my place and I'll tell you all about it."

24. Light: Um...I need a little help with my Calculus, can you integrate my natural log? Misa:???

25. Light: If you had some nuts on the wall, couldn't they be called walnuts? (Yes). If you had some nuts on your chest, could they be called chestnuts? (Yes) If you had some nuts on your chin, could they be chinnuts? (Yes.) Hell no, you'd have a dick in your mouth.*

26. Light:You know how some men buy really expensive cars to make up for certain, well, shortages? Well, I don't even own a car.

27. Light: How do you like your eggs in the morning? Fertilized?

28. Light: Are you a virgin? (No.) Prove it!*

29. Light: Do you live on a chicken farm? (No.) You sure know how to raise cocks

30. Misa: Pick a number between 1 and 10. You lose. Take off your clothes.*

31. Misa: I don't know what you think of me, but I hope it's X-rated.

32. Misa: I'm easy, but it looks like you are hard.*

33. Misa: I wanna take out your golf clubs and score a HOLE in 1.

34. Light: Hi. I'm horny.*

35. Light: You look like my type: Nice hair, beautiful eyes, amazing body, but there is still just one problem: your clothing. (What's wrong with my clothing?) They're still on.*

36. Light: My cat has lovely fur. Can I see yours?*

37. Misa: You know how I am with dicks? I suck at it.

38. Light: You're on my list of things to do tonight.*

39. Light: "I have this magic watch that can actually talk to me. Seriously, it's saying something right now." Put ear to watch. "It says that you're not wearing any underwear, is that true?." [No.] "Oh..." Tap watch a few times. "That's the problem... my watch is an hour fast!"*

40. Light: I'm gonna have sex tonight!!! I'm gonna have sex tonight!!! (With whom?) Depends: What are you doing tonight at around 1?*

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Brandihyuuga-i know iknow...not enough misa ones but hey! i tried! i think this one went a little more vivid then the last chapter......and the ones wit this * next to it r the ones that actually worked on some ppl! seriously! i went out with my friends and tried them!!! u should to...*winkwink* til next time!


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